Monday, December 31, 2012

Echoing the Snuze

My dear friend, the Snuze, posted a comment that was most apt in my previous entry.

I do agree with her, but I also disagree. Becoming a changed and better person after paying a visit to the Holy Lands is true...
But only for a select few.

I have seen it with my own eyes. These lucky people, they're still themselves, but at the same time they're much better and more besides.
Do you get what I mean?
Then all I can say is that seeing is believing, and I certainly have seen.

Unfortunately, I am not one of the chosen ones.

If I said that the story of Les Miserables did more to affirm my faith in Allah than any other formal 'ibaadah- would you understand me? Or would you condemn me as an apostate?

But I did. After the show, it was raining heavily as I travelled all the way back from Bandar Utama to Kelana Jaya and I was raining and booming along with the lightning and thunder.

For myself
For my family
For those I often hold more dear to heart than family

I prayed and I cried.
I couldn't differentiate between the raindrops splashing against my helmet's visor and the tears gushing from my eyes.
I couldn't differentiate between the sound of thunder and the prayers being wrenched out of lips from my soul.

I'm so weak
Take care of them for me
because I can barely take care of myself
Deny us the fate of our beloved Prophet's sollAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam beloved Uncle
We know it is completely in your Power
our ultimate fate
But, please...
pity us our weaknesses
And look down on us with Rahiim

Our Minder, our Caretaker
Please, please... bestow upon us in this world
all the goodness there ever was
as well as in the hereafter
all the goodness there ever was
and deliver us from the Fires


Snuze said...

Perhaps I have not been fortunate enough to meet these transformed individuals who became better after pilgrimage.

When you said that Les Mis gave you a stronger affirmation of God's love to you than any ibadah, darling one I understand and feel the same (though not for Les Mis).

We should have a chat about this and explore it further. BTW, have you seen the Hobbit? And if not, want to watch it with me and Naz tomorrow (New Year)?

Ri said...

sorry for being late replying to your invitation.

thanks! but apparently, i don't think i will be able to make it since it's already past 2pm on said day and all that :p haha!

Snuze said...

Aw ... too bad. Anyhoo, we watched the 2.30 3D version since the projector malfunctioned.

Back to your post, I think ppl should stop tossing about accusations of apostasy. Because at the end of the day, our connection with God is personal and no one can make that judgment except for Him.