Do you ever wonder why you react a certain way when faced with certain things?
I wonder no longer...
I always blow up, get irritated and even downright defensive when I need to stand up for what I believe in.
Looking back, I realized that as a teen, I almost never win an argument with my parents.
My thinking was less matured, of course, and if I my feelings weren't burning so strongly, I would have been able to see the validity of their argument.
One may think, it happened such a long time ago that it no longer affect us.
In fact, it left such a big impression on me that I always have this unshakeable feeling that I will lose any argument when standing up for myself.
Thus, I get all worked up and angry for no apparent reason.
However, that does not mean that my parents were always right. Valid reasons do not necessarily make the right reasons.
For example, my move to a different high school after Form 3, to a better school by far , but I failed to thrive there.
In fact, I got even more emotionally messed up and performed much less than expected, academically.
I understand that parents want the best for their children. And they make decisions based on their pooled experiences and knowledge. But is it enough?
It may be the best we can do as parents but it may not be the best for our children.
So this is where du'aa comes in. Pray like anything that you've made the right decisions for your children in the long run.
To those parents out there, remember that our children learn mostly from their main carers who are supposed to be us, parents, by the way, so there's only ourselves to blame if the kids start emulating characteristics from bibik- but that is another story.
Individual personality and external factors do play a role but ultimately, it is:
1. The way you, Moms and Dads, treat each other
2. The way you treat your children
3. The way you treat other people
4. The way you react to things around you
that will be the basic model for how your children will behave.
And the hardest thing to remember is that there is NO WAY that parents can treat their children the same!
Each child is different and it is our job to find out how to handle each one, balancing it just so that you fulfill the needs of each child while none feel neglected in any way.
Tough, huh? So what did you think the institution of marriage is all about?
It is not just a simple matter of getting the license to f***
It is all about building future generations...
P.S. Why is it that when I start out to write one kind of entry, it ends up as a totally different kind of entry altogether?